Don’t Tell Me You Love Me

Three alternatives to “those three words.”

Photo by Scott Broome on Unsplash

Why is it that, whenever we think about those three words, the three words in question are always “I love you”?

My biggest problem with that specific phrase is that it breaks one of the cardinal rules of writing. Say it with me, kids:

Show, don’t tell.

When you say I love you, yeah, you’re being nice. You are sending positive thoughts from yourself to me. That’s worth something. But, man, if you really want to show your love, here are the those three words I’d prefer.

Here’s some pizza!

Hoo boy. This one’s going to open me up to Internet hate from skinny people, who think that my brain shouldn’t be going to food. Yeah, whatever.

Pizza is good. Pizza is heaven. Pizza is love.

There is something magical about that conglomeration of bread and tomatoes and cheese and an unbounded panoply of other toppings.

And, yes, that includes the humble pineapple.

But these ingredients, through some earthly transubstantiation, become more than the sum of the parts. They become their own heavenly thing, transcending all earthly humility and ascending to become, if not the food of the gods, then at…