Your origin story sounds so much like mine. I remember when I was a senior in high school, and I connected with someone I went to elementary school with on MySpace (I’d moved around quite a bit, and definitely wasn’t in contact with any of those folks). I was, but not quite surprised when she said “I remember you, you always talked about wanting to die.”

Whole bunch of suicide attempts, whole bunch of failure — both at the suicide attempts, and at life in general. Poverty, dropping out of school, writing a novel that nobody wanted, the whole nine yards.

So there’s something alluring about your journey. But something about these mind-altering drugs scares the shit out of me.

I’m gonna come back to this, but mostly, yeah. Alcohol and drugs are the two demons I haven’t really flirted with. And there’s something about ketamine sounds exhilarating and so fucking frighting at the same time. A cure? I’d like to hope so. BUt there’s also a part of me that thinks “better the Devil you know…”